i am officially in love with lisa.

If you have talked with me in the past 48 hours, you would know that me having a travel crisis is the understatement of my "abroad" life. Lisa was my savior.

Lisa was here since Tuesday as part of her London study abroad program. I have not spoken to Lisa with my own voice since April during finals week last Winter semester where we both hadn't been to England yet, and she was jealous of me because I was going within a matter of days, and I was jealous of her because I knew I would be jealous of her later, when my program was over. We were on the same freshman floor. I like Lisa because I knew that even though we really didn't "hang out" freshman year, and I think I saw her maybe three times last year, I knew it would be fun to hang out with her in Paris, that there would not be a gap in the conversation, and that it was quite probable that we would have a splendid time. Because I like her.

When I found out at the Musée D'Orsay that she loves Monet, I took her here: Except for before that, we had to revamp at Angelina with some hot chocolate.



We had each of the waterlily rooms to ourselves for about a whole two minutes. It was wonderful. After walking near the Seine, and a trip into Shakespeare and Co., we went up to the top of Notre Dame, which I haven't done yet, which was beautiful, because the sky was clear and the sun was beautiful and orange, and Lisa has a thing for sunsets. Along with hair and fabric in paintings, shadows, not liking things that other people like just to be contrary, and not making things awkward because they don't need to be.


Lisa working her magic. And my wonderful framing skills. Look at Lisa's ear in the top left corner. It's my favorite part.

view:



And our conversation jumped between our friends, study abroads, my study abroad to England and how it is similar/different from hers, Rachel Ashby, going on missions, the fact that everyone we know is getting married, Rachel Ashby, England, literature, being nerds, hot chocolate, how I am kind of scared of Monet's waterlilies because you can't actually understand them from up close, and that you understand them better when you are closer to the panel you are not looking at, Rachely Ashby, and no horizons in the waterlilies paintings, and England, and London, and Paris, and the tube and the metro, and beautiful gardens, and gaudy English decor and beautiful, whimsical french decor, and attractive people in Paris, Rachely Ashby, and saying "lovely," and how Paris is emotional and passionate, and how London is intellectual and loves memory, about giving directions in a British accents, my incompetence in speaking French, good crepe prices, the city versus the country, study abroad group dynamics, about being friends with lots of different people, and how Lisa admitted that even though everyone loves Paris and therefore she was playing hard to get, Paris won. Which made me so very happy. Lisa, I think I kind of felt like that too before I came on study abroad here. I was fully ready to never let myself love Paris because somehow that might take away from how much I love England. And now all I can say is what every person says, and you say "thank you for being so vague": they're different. And I love both of them.

don't you feel as though these could almost be parts of a temple? I think church should definitely consider building in the gothic style.

I thought I was so funny taking these:

Lisa, I am so happy that I got to see you today and spend the day with you. You made me feel so much better. And I really needed that.

Vomit.

There comes a time in trip planning when "OMG we're going to GREECE!!!" just doesn't cut it anymore. This is the part where I look at my bank account, and I tell myself, "okay. I can either go to Santorini, or eat this week." And some how, no matter how hard I try, I keep choosing the eating part. It's when you feel sick, when you just say, I could spend five-hundred dollars and go to Greece, and have to figure out the ferry schedule, and how to get from place to place, maybe have to take a couple of taxis I didn't budget for, stay at pretty grimy hostels, and look at Greece in it's perhaps stormy and rainy weather, and imagine it in all of it's summer glory. Or, I could spend as much money as I need right now. Actually afford to buy gifts for the people I wanted to buy gifts for, be able to eat and enjoy french cuisine and not just french bananas and yogurt. And not feel guilty for spending money here. Every. Single. Time. I am coming to Provo for four days before Oregon, and I just realized that I have not budgeted a cent for that as of yet. And suddenly going straight home on December 7 just sounds so easy, being able to curl up on my parents' couch and drink hot chocolate and play with Ellie and talk to Rachel and eat without worrying about money and help my mom put up the Christmas decorations and go golfing with my dad at the marshy golf course and breathe in the beautiful smell that is wet Oregon. Wet dirt and wet pine trees and wet pavement and damp sky.

But, I don't really have a choice now. If only my bank account would magically fill up, and if only Madame would ask us if we were going to Greece, and if we were, that she would actually love it if we kept our luggage here, and that of course she wouldn't be going to her country house and getting the apartment painted until we left.

At the moment, this is the only thing that is motivating me to navigate any of this (and the fact that all of my plane tickets are bought already):

it almost makes me happy because the picture was taken in december.

I felt like this in London before going to Italy and Ireland, and so did Lori, and Whitney, and Roxanne.

please tell me that it will be worth it.

tell me to suck it up and stop being a baby.

tell me that I am a spoiled brat and you were throwing up reading this and you hate me and there is no reason I should be complaining right now.

and tell St. Nickolaus to deposit his coins into my bank account, because I won't be there to put out my shoes.

Tati

isn't she so pretty?

A good friend of mine sent me an essay of his where the opening image is of him and a friend sprinting across the intersection/roundabout of the Arc de Triomphe.

If you have been there, and if you have watched traffic from the top of the arc,

you know how ridiculous the traffic is, because basically cars just enter the intersection, and slowly every car inches out of the way of each other, and things clear up and meanwhile, motorcycles and mopeds weave in and out through all of the cars, inches from bumpers and tiny mistakes and death. And if you didn't know that, now you do.

There is a pedestrian tunnel, everyone. Please take the tunnel, for your own safety.

I really didn't think I could yell that across the intersection at Tati and her cool half Morrocan, half American, fluent in French friend Sophi. So, instead I pulled out my camera.

Tati is here for a week, and the last time I saw her was for my sister Cami's farewell in March in Eugene. It was so strange to see her in Paris, but so good. It's weird that it felt like a piece of Eugene in Paris, but really, she doesn't live in Eugene anymore, so really she is a piece of Munich visiting me, but really a part of my family visiting me too. We spent Christmas together last year, we have the same onesie my mom bought for all of us, we went to the holiday market together.

It's so weird because she was such a part of my family for a whole nine months, she knew all of the Eugene gossip, became part of our ward and our family, knew what was happening with all of my sisters, and now she is living in an apartment going to school in Munich, and we hear from her every once in a while. She is doing well, studying German history and English, and she just got a job at a men's chic clothing store. Sophi wanted to go shopping at H&M and Zara, so with the millions of places to choose from where the stores are located, of course I chose to go to the huge stores on the Grands Boulevard, which is right next to the Opera house, a famous street for shopping, and a really beautiful area, especially now that Christmas decorations are just beginning to appear. So obviously, I told them we had to get off at the stop, "Grands Boulevards." Woops! Big mistake. We were about four stops away from the area I was really trying to get to. Good thing I live here in Paris. How dumb. I was so embarrassed. And their feet were so tired from having visited the Musée D'Orsay in the morning. So I felt so stupid, but, we made it there, and hopefully I will be able to redeem myself tomorrow when we get to see each other again.

This week has been a bit difficult, because I bought tickets to go to GREECE (one of my life goals, see right side of my blog list at the bottom...) and remembered that I do not have limitless funds, even though it feels like that whenever I buy something. Especially something expensive. It is hard to remember to be careful with money, and sometimes for me it takes days to remember how to really entertain myself without having to spend money. It's ridiculous. But then, it only takes one large purchase to remember how exciting it is to buy something new.

So, thank you Tati for helping me remember how fun it is to roam the streets without having to spend money! Also, because of Greece, I told her I didn't think I would be able to take a trip to Munich to visit her, and she was so sad, and so was I. We both agreed that I should just petition Sir Troy and his immense generosity...

My roommate Cami took the most beautiful pictures of her favorite foods for her photo project (these pictures are so beautiful they make me want to die), and I was inspired to do my own little still life shoot. Here are my favorite beautiful old books of Madame's:

and just to give you some context, some furniture:

She was out of town this weekend, so we finally finished watching Anne of Avonlea in the front room.